The author, Cameron West ,
Dear Readers,
Earlier tonight Rikki, my wife of seventeen years, made
vegetable tamales with Dusty, one of my 24 alter
personalities. A little later, at dinner, Rikki told me that
there was a place on Amazon.com for authors to write
something about their books and that I should consider doing
so. "Rik," I replied, "these are great
tamales." After a thought-filled silence she said,
"Cam, people don't know you. Just tell them why you
wrote the book."
Well, I was diagnosed five and a half years ago with
Dissociative Identity Disorder (DID), the condition that used
to be known as Multiple Personality Disorder. DID is a coping
mechanism for dealing with extreme and repeated childhood
sexual, physical, or emotional abuse (in my case, incest).
Since my diagnosis, it's been a tortuous ride--for me
personally, for the 24 alters who have lived in my mind since
I was very young, and for Rikki and our now eleven-year-old
son Kyle. Somehow Rikki and I have held our family together,
continually seeking higher ground, even when the path was
muddy and slick, and angry clouds were raining misery and
doubt.
There was a little boy to shelter, a friendship and
marriage to protect, and a shattered mind to accept and
repair. Rikki and I locked arms and hearts and kept trudging,
and then something happened: the muck started to dry and our
feet found solid ground. We'd made it--not to the top, but to
a ridge. And that felt like something worth writing about.
I also wanted to speak to others whose experiences
resonate with mine. I know how lonely it is to feel different
and damaged. In some strange way, through telling my story, I
wanted to offer myself as a witness to those people who share
the experience of having had their souls scraped at an early
age.
Finally, I wrote the book so you would know what DID feels
like, with the hope that you might think of others you
perceive as mentally ill with greater understanding. I wish
you the courage to seek the peace that exists in every
moment.
Cam West
